Friday, March 25, 2011

Nothing can ever just be easy for me, can it?

So I emailed the trainer about the contest. The poster announcing the contest says the results will be based on % of weight lost, but it turns out the contest is actually % of body fat lost. And guess what? Only way they have to figure % of body fat is the Ironman scale. One of the gyms in a neighboring town (28 or so miles away) has a commercial grade Ironman scale. I can go weigh there, apparently.

I just... urgh. I'm glad they have one. I'm glad I can, I guess, still be in the contest. But I guess I've gotta make a special trip to TXK just to weigh in for this contest. And I have to figure out... how the info on my body fat % is supposed to get from their branch of the gym to mine. And even better, I guess I get to go to the other branch and say "Hey, so my home gym is having this contest, and I signed up, and their scale doesn't have a high enough capacity to weigh me for the stupid contest. So... I need you guys to weigh me. Don't worry, I'll be the only one coming from my club needing to be weighed, I'm sure, because once again, I'm the biggest/heaviest girl in the room. Again."

I'm reminded so much of 7th grade phys ed. Our school had just gone from changing from a Junior High to a Middle School. During my 6th grade year, they still used the old shirts that said AJHS, and you could take the school-issued one, or you could go buy a shirt and shorts from the local athletic store, that had your name on the shirt and your initials on the shorts. I did that because, eww, who wants to wear someone else's shorts and stuff, and because I knew I could control what size I got. My 7th grade year, they got all new uniforms with shirts that said AMS. I got stuck with an XL shirt, because that was the biggest size they'd ordered. I got it on, but it was very, very tight and uncomfortable. I needed a 2X. The shorts I was issued never left my gym locker, because again, the biggest they'd ordered was an XL, and they weren't even close to fitting. I had to wear my pair from the year before, which were, of course, a different color maroon and a different style than the current shorts.

*sighs* It feels the same. Yeah, you get to participate, but only after we've made you hate yourself a little more for being different.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

the good and the frustrating

So tonight at weigh in, I got quite the surprise. I figured I was down maybe one and a half or two pounds (based on what my scale at home said) but the receptionist says "WOW!" and I'm all "Huh?" and she says, "You lost 4.2 pounds!" I honestly thought she was kidding or read it wrong or something. LOL
Good deal... I'm now only 2/10ths of a pound away from 30 pounds lost.

So... that's the good. Here's the frustrating:

My gym is doing a weight loss contest. I went and signed up today, and we're all supposed to weigh in the first week of April, and then again at the end of May. Here's the problem. They're going to have us weigh in on their IronMan scale. When I went for my consultation with the trainer, she tried to weigh me on it, and we got an error message because I was too heavy for it and exceeded the weight limit. I thought, having lost nearly 30 pounds, I'd be under the limit, but I just googled the model they have, and nope. I'm still 17 pounds over the limit.

So when I go to weigh in at the beginning of April, I'll have that fun *sarcasm* experience of getting an error message because I'm too heavy for their scale. And even though they have a regular scale that I don't exceed the weight limit on, I'm sure they're not going to weigh me on that when they're weighing everyone else in on the IronMan. So basically, I'm probably out of this contest before it even starts. And I'm sitting here feeling sick at my stomach and wanting to cry, because I was actually looking forward to this. Really looking forward to it.

:(

Saturday, March 19, 2011

So it turns out 25 pounds is pretty heavy.

I found a 25 pound dumbbell tonight at the gym and picked it up. It pretty much took both hands. 25 pounds may not seem like a lot when I'm thinking about how much I still need to lose, but when I go and pick up a 25 pound weight, it's amazing knowing I'm not hauling that around anymore. No wonder I feel better and I'm moving faster. :)

I also decided I'd try out the elliptical again tonight. I said to myself I just wanted to make it 7 minutes. I decided to set the timer for 8 minutes... and when I got close to 8, I bumped it up to 10. When I got close to 10, I thought to myself, why not 15 minutes? So I did 15 minutes, plus a 5 minute cool down, for a total of 20 minutes on the elliptical. I can very clearly remember it wasn't that long ago that I struggled to make 3 minutes on it. And by the end of my 20 minutes, yeah, I was REALLY ready to be done, but I did it. Afterwards I did 35 minutes on the treadmill, at 2.5mph so I'd have nearly an hour of workout time.

Friday, March 18, 2011

25 pounds.

Technically, 25.6 pounds. GONE. I didn't hang around for the meeting tonight, but I'll get my 25 pound award (and another 5 pound star) at the meeting Tuesday.

I need to try to remember to find a 25 pound weight and pick it up when I go to the gym tomorrow, just to get a real sense of how much weight that really is. On the one hand, I know that's a signficant amount of weight, and I am proud of losing it. On the other hand, I can't help but think it's a small amount compared to what I still have to lose.

So I guess Mom had gone to the Arkansas-side Walmart, and they had new NASCAR stuff in, including a pair of mens' sleep shorts. Mens' Kyle Busch sleep shorts, to be exact. She told me they had a pair of 2Xs, so we went there after I weighed in. I bought them, thinking it would probably be a while before I could wear them... well, they're made of jersey-type material. And I tried them on when I got home, and while they don't fit loose like they're intended to, they do indeed fit and aren't uncomfortable. Pretty exciting stuff.

Also exciting? I finally bumped up to a higher weight on the shoulder press tonight, and I wasn't completely dying when I finished my set. In other words, maybe it won't take too long to go up another 5 pounds on it.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Time to brag for a minute

I actually got to bump up to a higher weight on all my arm, chest, and back exercises tonight, with the exception of the shoulder press. I love it, because I know it means I'm getting stronger. =)  Plus, I've been walking more than 2 miles most nights. Actually, a tiny bit over 2 and a half miles. On the nights that I take it "easy", I'm walking over a mile and a half. That's crazy to me. When I started in January, I probably couldn't have even walked for 15 minutes, at a really slow pace. I was working hard to get 20 minutes on the bike. Right now, the speed that just absolutely felt like I was going to die if I walked at it for more than a minute when I first started on the treadmill... it's too slow to feel comfortable now. =)

When I flex, I can TOTALLY feel that I have biceps! Yes, they're hidden under a lot of jiggle, but they're there! So awesome!

I've decided that I want to do the track walk at TMS at the November race. I've always thought it would be cool to do, but I knew there was no way in hell I could walk a mile and a half track, and I didn't want to be one of those people having to get a ride back on the golf cart. But that's far enough away that I KNOW I'll be able to handle it. 

Thursday, March 3, 2011

omgggggggggggg!

So... I was down another pound at weigh-in last night, which brings me to a total of 20.2 pounds lost. I got another 5 pound star. Mom and I went to town early yesterday, because we had some bills to go pay, and we also had a coupon to buy one, get one half off for lunch at Buffalo Wild Wings.  We spent some time just browsing clothes at Kohls, and then we went over to the shoe section, where I gazed longingly at all the cute heels. After walking around and picking up heels and looking at them all and dreaming about buying them once I'm smaller and can actually stand to walk in them, I decided I wanted to look at running shoes and training shoes. I tried on five or six pairs, just for grins, to see what I liked and didn't. Right now I don't actually need a new pair of shoes, but I'm thinking maybe a nice new pair of running shoes would be a good gift for myself at 50 pounds lost, maybe. I looked at all these bright neon shoes that I would've been scared to get before, for fear that they'd draw attention to my feet and just how slowly I walk. Now I look at them and think, hell yeah, let them draw attention-- they just scream fun! After Kohls we ended up going to Academy. They just opened our Academy store a couple months ago, and this was my first trip to it. I've been to one before, and I don't remember being impressed, but this time I was walking around wide-eyed and thinking "This place is like exercise heaven!" I wanted to look at their workout clothes, again, just as a sort of 'let me dream about being able to walk in and buy this stuff to look cute in while I bust my ass' thing, but Mom and I started poking around (I really will need to get new sports bras at the rate I'm going) and we discovered a rack of Nike plus-sized clothes! No plain sports bras, but they did have the racerback tops that have a bra built in. (I used to have one that was made my Just My Size that I loved and wore until it literally came apart from being washed so much) They also had these Dri-Fit shirts in pretty colors, and sure enough, when we dug through the rack, they had stuff in a 3X. I was thrilled, but I didn't really have enough money to get anything. We made a mental note to come back later when funds are more plentiful, and then kept walking back... where we found a clearance rack. And with some digging, I found a white Nike Dri-Fit top in a 3X on the clearance rack for half price. I went and tried it on, and while it is tight, it fits. (I assume part of that has to do with the material it's made from) I decided to get it, and we walked on around to shoes, where I tried on another five pair or so.

So I wore my fun little top to the gym tonight, and as I pulled up, there was another car in the parking lot. A month ago, even, if I'd pulled up and saw someone else was there, I would've left. Especially once I realized it was a guy. Especially with me in a body-hugging shirt.Tonight, I said screw it, and went on in. I did my hour on the treadmill, at 2.3mph (with the last 10 minutes at 2.5mph) while watching the reunion show of MTV's I Used to Be Fat. So much of what was said during the interviews about the process really stuck in my head-- how it ended up changing them as people, not just changing their weight. I can really identify with that. I know it's only been 2 months, but I can feel myself becoming more confident. Anyway, I finished up at about the same time he did, and as we were both getting off our machines, he says to me "Wow, you were really KILLING it over there!" I can't even describe the feeling I got hearing that. He asked me how long I'd been a member, told me it was only his second time going, and he asked me about what times were best as far it not being crowded. We had this whole little five minute conversation walking out to our cars, and after I left, I realized "Wow, I had a whole conversation with a stranger, I made eye contact, and at no point was I self-conscious and thinking about how horrible I looked, etc, etc."

I love the changes I'm seeing in myself!